I sewed!

I sewed poorly...but I sewed. The fact that I even found the time to sew anything at all is a huge triumph for me. I wanted to get the girls cute, personalized Christmas stockings, but the ones I was looking at on Etsy were going to cost $70-$80 and I just didn't feel like spending that much. Actually, I was going to spend that much, but I woke up at 4:30 am one morning, and I felt my neglected sewing machine calling to me from the corner of the room, "You should be ashamed of yourself....stockings can't be that hard to make....come on, you should do this yourself...you have no reason to buy stockings when I'm sitting here not being used...." Strangely, my sewing machine/conscience's voice sounds exactly like my cousin Becky's voice.

So I did it. Courtney accompanied me to Jo Ann when she was out for a weekend visit and helped me pick out material. I chose flannel for the stockings and minky for the cuffs. Then, I printed a pattern from the Internet and perused a couple of tutorials. Here's the finished result:

They look fine to the uncritical eye, but I made a few mistakes and I couldn't quite get the heel rounded out enough on Blake's. I did cut notches on the inside seam to try to round it out better, but it just didn't quite work for some reason. I also messed up sewing the cuff onto Blake's and got the seam out the outside- twice. The second time I was just sick of it, so I just left it that way! And told myself, I'll make better ones next year- these are just the practice ones. :) I didn't feel they were embroidery-worthy so I just made handwritten name tags for them (I can't get these pictures to upload straight on here).

So, we'll see if I actually redo these for next year, but at least I busted out the sewing machine and got a little practice. And, as you can see, they served their purpose just fine. :)

Something old, something new...Bennett's big girl room

Well, this post has certainly been a long time coming. I think I've had a vision for Bennett's big-girl room from the time she was born, or maybe even before. We certainly never thought we'd have two kids in our current house, so when we found out Blake was on the way, we knew we'd have to make the guest room into Bennett's room and she would just have to share it when we had company. (And I think we've had company at least 5 times so far...depending on who it is, Bennett sleeps in our room or forces the guest to let her cuddle up- haha!).

I always wanted to give her a vintage-looking room. I'm just not into the matchy-matchy themed things you can get (although that would certainly have made it a lot easier!). My inspiration was thinking about things my grandmothers might have had in their rooms growing up- a wrought-iron bed, needlework art, glass lamps, etc. We started actually working on the room in June, and it is just now to the point where I feel like it's finished enough to show pictures! So, here's a tour:

The right side of the room. The bookshelf is new (from IKEA). It had an ugly, greyish cardboard backing to it, so I chose an old-fashioned looking fabric with tiny roses and we glued it on that backing with spray adhesive. It was dumb to choose something with stripes (because it was impossible to get it exactly straight), but you really can't tell unless you're studying it closely. The big chair belonged to Ben's grandparents and I have to say, even though it might not exactly match the decor, it is awesome to have a full-sized, rocking recliner in her room to use as a reading chair. Here are some closer photos of the bookshelf:

The lamp was mine growing up (I think it belonged to my aunt), the tea cup was my great-aunt's, the little girl figurine was mine and came from the jewelry store where my grandma used to work (Hudson's for anyone from Alton reading this), the little jewelry holder next to it (you can't really see it) was made by my grandmother (she made them as favors for my mom's wedding shower), the glass box held the rings at my wedding, the photos are of my grandparents, the flower art was my great-grandmother's, the teapot was my grandmother's, the beaded lamp was a centerpiece at my wedding, the girl in the yellow dress is actually an old Avon perfume bottle my grandmother had that I loved as a little girl, and the piggy bank is actually new and belongs to Bennett!

All her favorite books she can keep in her room now. The flowers in the basket are my wedding bouquet and the adorable pillow underneath was made by my talented cousin.

This shelf I got for $1.99 at Goodwill and painted white. The books belonged to me (Mr. Flopears and Dumbo), my brother (Scuffy the Tugboat), and my dad (Pete the Tramp and The Flying Sandbox). The Raggedy Ann doll was a gift from my dad to my mom while they were dating. Not sure what will wind up on the hooks but we have snowflakes and old-fashioned Christmas ornaments for now.

The nightstand was mine growing up (I think my mom got it at a garage sale). The milk-glass lamp was also mine growing up and I'm not sure where my mom got it, but it's old. The "Now I lay me..." cross-stitch was in both my brother's and my nurseries when we were babies.

The bed is actually fairly new (also from IKEA). I had a really old Jennie Lynn bed that I grew up on but it was only for a double mattress and we put the queen in this room when we got a king for our room. It is pretty funny having a 2-year-old sleep in a queen bed. We had to buy her a step-stool to get up in it and sometimes when I go check on her, I can barely find her in the midst of all the pillows, blankets, and stuffed animals. The old window came from a building salvage place around here (only like $10!) and we were going to paint on it, but let's face it, I'm not that talented and I don't have the time, so Ben took over the project and ordered vinyl letters from Etsy. I think it turned out pretty cute! I felt a patchwork quilt was a must (I would really like to find an old-fashioned looking chenille coverlet, too, but haven't found anything I like yet), and this one was a gift from my aunt. It isn't easy finding little-girlish bedding for a queen-sized bed, but my mom had a few sets of sheets she passed down to me that look nice. And my parents don't skimp on thread count so Bennett is living in luxury and has way nicer sheets than Ben and I do.

The lace curtains were in my room in high school (and we also used them on the altar at Courtney's wedding :) and all the vintage plates I "borrowed" from my mom's house. She told me where they all came from but I was really pregnant at the time and I can't remember a thing she said. I do know that at least one of them belonged to my great-grandmother.

The needlework art by the closet was done by my great-aunt:

I loved the thought of Bennett having her own Christmas tree in her room. This one belongs to my grandma...I just love these vintage-looking ceramic trees and they make great nightlights:

I think this just about concludes our tour! I still have one blank wall (to the left of the bed) that I'm not quite sure what to do with...suggestions are welcome! I love this room and it is just what I had in mind for Bennett- and who knows, if we continue living in this house, it may be enjoyed by both our little B girls!

'Tis the season...

You might say I've been remiss in my blogging lately, and in my list-accomplishing, and in my changing out of sweatpants, etc., etc., etc. The truth is that having two kids is really kicking my butt, and I haven't even gone back to work yet. I worked so hard to have these few months off with my kids, and one of the things I desired most was to be able to relax and truly enjoy the holidays. I'm really trying, but life right now seems to be one big lesson in reality vs. expectations. What I pictured was a clean house, a freezer full of meals I'd have all fall to stock up on, a family day getting and decorating the Christmas tree, Bennett falling asleep to a CD of Christmas music each night with visions of sugar plums dancing in her head, matching pajamas and stockings for the girls, etc. Reality, however, is that my house is a constant mess (sometimes I think I would give my left arm to have a toy room or a craft room or just another ROOM for all this stuff), Bennett has a double ear infection and strep throat and will currently eat only popsicles, she finds the Disney Christmas CD to be "scary," we have so little time in the evening that we've been trying for 5 days and have only accomplished getting the tree and putting lights on it (who needs ornaments?), no children's clothing manufacturer seems to make matching PJs for a 3-month-old and a 3-year-old for a reasonable sum, and my homemade stockings are looking a little janky (but that's another blog post).

One thing I really wanted to do this year was to create an advent calendar for Bennett. There are so many cute ones available that look like trains or gingerbread houses, but I really have no place to put one and I really have no place to store one. Plus, if you know my daughter you know she would clean that thing out the first day and demand a refill. So I settled on using our banister to create one. I just wish I had a better camera to show pictures of it. I just strung a wired ribbon around the banister and attached with ribbon 24 circles I cut out of Christmas-themed scrapbook paper and punched holes through. On the front of each circle I wrote the number for the date and on the back I wrote the surprise or activity for the day. You know, like "pick up all your toys," "get a flu shot," "give mommy a back rub," etc. All right, I'm not that horrible of a parent. There are fun things on there like going to the indoor water park for her birthday and I also have several Christmas books I ordered through her preschool and Scholastic Book Club (so cheap!) that I am excited to give her. Now if we could only get around to decorating that tree...

Blake Anna

She's here! And I knew she would be a girl. :) Blake Anna arrived at 10:29 am on Wednesday, August 31. She weighed 9 pounds (hmmmm, no wonder I was so uncomfortable the last couple months of this pregnancy) and was 20.5 inches long. She is just perfect. So cute, chubby, sweet, and cuddly.

My labor and delivery went pretty well. My water broke at home at about 3:00 am. As weird as it sounds, that is an experience I always wondered about and kind of wanted to have. You really can hear a "pop" and then the deluge begins! What a crazy feeling! After driving through the middle of a police chase, we made it downtown to the hospital about 4:00 am. I labored hard for about 2-3 hours while waiting- very, very impatiently- for my epidural. It was smooth sailing after that. My doctor arrived about 10:20, and a few pushes later, she was out! I expected her to look just like Bennett- she doesn't. The first thing I noticed was that she was a lot bigger!

They didn't take her away from me for over an hour, so we didn't know how much she weighed at first. Ben went with her up to the nursery for her bath and tests, and he texted me her weight and length. I just had to laugh. Big "sistie" Bennett was really hoping for a girl. She was so excited to meet her and has been wonderful with her so far.

Everything is going well at home, but those late-night feedings sure leave me exhausted. Ben has been off work, so I've had plenty of time to catch up on sleep during the day, but I have no idea what I'll do when he goes back to work later this week! It should be interesting. I'm more grateful than ever to have the rest of this year off work to make this adjustment. I'm so thankful for my awesome husband and both of our healthy, beautiful girls. I am so blessed!

Halfway house

I know how much my friends love people's pregnancy countdowns, so I thought I'd mention that it's 34 days until my due date. :) It seems that being pregnant is my biggest motivation in life to get things done. I was the same way with my first pregnancy- I had a long "to-do" list and had every weekend planned out for all the projects that needed to be accomplished before the baby arrived. There was no way Bennett could be born before I completed such vital tasks as organizing all the kitchen cabinets, getting the carpets cleaned, getting that last layer of mulch on my roses before winter, etc.

I have had the same motivation during this pregnancy- only with a lot less energy, ability, and free time with which to address it. Hmmmm...who knew having a 2-year-old could make such a difference. With my mom's and Ben's help, the past month or so has been a flurry of cleaning closets and drawers, hanging shelves, making trips to Goodwill, and generally trying to get the house in order and make room for a fourth member of our family. We have made good progress, but there's still plenty to do- baby clothes to be washed, baby items to be purchased, a "big girl" room to finish decorating, etc.

There are a few items on the "to-do" list this time, though, that were definitely not there last time, and those are the ones that are really stretching me to my limits. There were four things that I wanted to accomplish with Bennett before the end of the summer:

• Get her to give up her "nuks." I can't believe I'm admitting that my two-and-a-half year old still has half a dozen pacifiers that she likes to carry around with her and take into her bed. I am currently watching her play with them and give them turns going down her plastic slide. Her doctor said to get rid of them at 12 months- clearly, this is why. She totally doesn't need them. They have just become like her other playthings and she likes to have them around. There has always been an excuse for not just throwing them all away, of course. And now here we are, a month away from having a baby who might actually need pacifiers, and big sister is still attached to hers. True confession: she just told me that when she goes to school, she is going to take them with her for show & tell. Is it too soon to have a conversation about being "that kid"?

• Get her to eat a better variety of foods. Bennett basically eats- fruit bars, yogurt, crackers, graham crackers, Cheerios or Chex, applesauce, toast, the occasional waffle with honey, the occasional french fry, pizza, and chicken nuggets. Oh, and most anything that is junk food, like cookies, ice cream, or pop. But she won't even try other foods, even normal kid foods like hot dogs or mac & cheese. I have not wanted to make mealtimes into battles. Her doctor has assured me that she is getting what she needs, she'll eat when she's hungry, I don't need to force her to eat things, etc. However, at this point, I think even she is getting tired of eating the same old things. I know she would like so many more things if she would only try them. A lot of the time, she isn't really interested in food at all. So, I usually just go to the stand-bys so she'll at least have something in her stomach. 

• Get her potty-trained. I started working on this in March, as soon as I stopped spending the majority of my days puking. It's probably the most frustrating thing I've ever done with the exception of breastfeeding. Two steps forward, one step back. Weeks of dry undies, then an accident two minutes after she just went. I've come to understand this is the nature of potty-training. At this point, she is dry all the time with the exception of naps and night-time, and the occasional accident. But, she is still terrified to poop on the potty, to the point where she will hold it for several days, creating a whole new set of problems. At this point, I don't even try to get her to go on the potty anymore. I'm 35 weeks pregnant, and I can't physically hold her on there. I consider it a success if she goes at all, so pull-ups it is for now. 

• Get her sleeping in her big-girl bed. Definitely been putting this off until the last minute. Bennett has always been such a good sleeper and is completely comfortable in her crib. She goes to bed with no fussing, and she has never once tried to climb out. If possible, I would keep her in her crib until high-school graduation. However, we are going to need that crib soon so we decided to bite the bullet this weekend and make the move. I can already tell this is going to be about as fun as potty-training. It's taking about 2 hours to get her settled down and sleeping (complete with fits and screaming) and her new wake-up time seems to be 6:30, instead of 8:30 or 9:00. She is getting 3-4 hours less sleep at night, and of course, so are we. 

All this to say that I've been thinking a lot lately about the word "halfway." I really hate it. I'm a list-oriented person (even though my right-brainedness means that this is multiple lists in multiple locations, many of which I've forgotten about or lost). But, I still love that feeling of crossing something off my list. Of being "done" with that task. Of saying "I accomplished that" and not having to think about it anymore. I don't like "halfway."

The more time I spend as a parent, the more I am learning that there are a lot of times I'm going to have to live with "halfway." Right now, Bennett is halfway potty-trained. She has a halfway-decent diet. She is sleeping about half the night in her new bed. I should be happy for any progress we've made, but instead I'm frustrated that I can't cross these items off my list. It leaves me feeling incomplete. It makes me feel like I'm failing.

Somehow, I've got to learn how to live with "halfway"- because I have a feeling we are going to be living in a "halfway house" for many years to come. Learning to tie shoes, to read, to ride a bike- none of things will be accomplished in a day. And, come to think of it, there are a lot of things I'm only halfway there on- and I'm 31, not 2. I'm hoping that just recognizing this will be the first step in figuring out how to embrace it. Cause I love my kids (even if I've only met one in person so far) and want to enjoy them at every stage.

Time to go have another contraction now. I'll sign off with a picture of my girl in her big-girl bed for the first night- Nuks and all.